Raised in upstate New York, as the youngest of five siblings, I was an extremely sensitive child. Too sensitive. My mother’s disapproving looks would invoke fear which would send me into an internal chaos and instability from which I could not escape. I survived by striving to be perfect, and funny. Humor served to redirect the harsh expectations I could not meet. Later on it became a weapon in the form of sarcasm.
Many years later, in my mid 30s I discovered that I held a core belief that I was “inherently defective”. Well, that explained a lot. Plagued with deep-seated insecurity, my teenage rebellion, and a perfectionism that always left me wallowing in failure no matter how well I actually performed. I did not recognize why I did some of the “less-than-honorable” things that I did. I was weak and broken inside...
Select the menu item entitled "Hello" and scroll down to the healine "Darlene's Story" for a bit more information. Thanks for looking!
